Hoodening Play 2001

for the Tenterden Folk Festival

Moll:
We've come all the way from St Nicholas at Wade
We've cheated and come in cars, I'm afraid
My name is Molly and I sweep the floor
And bring good fortune as I come through the door
Sam:
'arry's our waggoner, but he is away
Watching some football, that 'Match of the Day'
Boy:
I am the Boy, a right cocky feller
There's not much that I can't tell yer
George:
Me, I'm George, the fiddle I play
I am a bit thick and have little to say
Sam:
Speaking of thick, my name is Sam
I curse, fart, and don't give a damn
Moll:
And this is our 'orse, Dobbin's his name
He looks fierce, but is really quite tame
Boy:
'twas in 1966 when this group started up
That's the last time England won the World Cup
Sam (aside):
That's the only time England won the World Cup!
Boy:
For 35 years we've performed through fright
Desperately trying to get our words right
George:
Each year our boy gets thrown from the horse
During which time our language gets coarse
And I think this time he'll give it a try
He's had a few drinks, and looks pretty spry
Sam:
Come on lad, up you go
He's a right awkward little so-and so
Moll:
He's on, but he don't look too steady
Dobbin will react whenever he's ready
[Boy digs in his heels]
Boy:
Whoa Dobbin, whoa!
Moll:
The 'orse has tossed our poor boy on the ground
He's banged his head, I can't hear a sound
George:
He's dead!
Sam:
               Nah, he's putting it on
George:
He looks a bit pale
Moll:
               You're right, he's gone
Cover him up with a sheet, it's sad
We've left it behind? That's too bad
Sam:
We'll leave him here and go for a beer
And pick him up if we call back next year
Boy:
You can't do that, I need a drink
All:
He's alive!
Sam:
Help him up… Cor, his armholes stink
Moll:
At this time we usually adjourn to the bar
And get a free drink for coming so far
George:
After that we sing a few carols
But it's not yet Christmas, so we'll sink a few barrels
All:
For if ye the Hooden horse do feed,
Throughout the year ye shall not need!

[Possibly sing "All along the rails" and/or "We are St Nicholas Hoodeners"]

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